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How To Talk To Women In A Club Or Lounge

Updated: May 17, 2023

Ahh one of our favorite topics, the opposite sex. So confusing and exciting at the same time. Well, this one is for the guys. Well, I guess it's for some of the girls too? But, I don't think girls need help talking to other girls, so yea, this is one is for the guys. How to talk to women at a club or lounge. Here we go.

Black man and Korean woman with santa hat talking together at Lit Lounge, hookah lounge and bar, in Itaewon, Seoul, South Korea
Christmas Party at Lit Lounge

The only rule you really need to keep in the front of your mind is that when talking to women in a lounge or club setting, it's super important to be respectful and considerate of their boundaries and personal space. Honestly, if respect comes first, everything else pretty much falls into place. Here are a few more tips to help you make a positive impression when talking to women while on a night out:

  1. Be Confident

    1. Confidence is key when approaching someone, it can be attractive and make you more appealing. However, remember that everything has to have balance - too much confidence can make you seem arrogant. Arrogance isn't sexy. Be confidently humble.

  2. Show Interest

    1. Show genuine interest in what they have to say and actively listen to them. Honestly, if you're not interested in what she's talking about, then she's obviously not the right fit for you. Oh and don't talk about yourself too, it's annoying, unless she asks you something specific about yourself.

  3. Respect boundaries

    1. I can't stress this enough. If she's not comfortable, not feeling you or just doesn't want to talk, that's her right, politely excuse yourself from the conversation and move on.

  4. Be creative

    1. "Where you from?" "Do you come around here a lot?" "Haven't I seen you before?" Please, please stop it. Be original. Come up with an interesting, creative or funny conversation starter, it will help break the ice and make a positive first impression. Remember, women hate being bored.

  5. Be Yourself

    1. Honestly, the most important thing is to be true to yourself and be comfortable in your own skin. Just be yourself, and if the connection is genuine, the conversation will flow naturally and you'll have no problems. The first step is the hardest, so sometimes just saying "hi" is enough. If your energy matches her energy, then it's all good.

Please remember, not everyone will be interested in talking to you, and that's totally fine. Rejection is a normal part of social interactions. As a matter of fact, rejection is necessary for growth. If you get rejected, politely accept it, be respectful, walk away and try again (but not in the same place, that's gonna make you look thirsty and that's also not sexy). Is there anything I missed? If so, leave a comment. Otherwise, keep talking and stay lit.

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